She's here... She's perfect... Just like the others... But different. (Gotta love it!=)
I'm thrilled to have carried, & introduced into this world, such a sweet, gentle, yet amazingly strong li'l girl... What a joy! Each of us, that have been privileged to meet her thus far, have agreed that the term "Gentle Strength" comes to mind when in her presence. She is truly powerfully good, & I have been undeniably blessed by her inhabitance within my life.
She was born after 3 hours & 20 minutes of (extremely) intense labor, did not exhaust me to the necessity of any medicinal aid, delivered after only 10 pushes (!!!), AND allowed for my body to heal seamlessly! =)=)=) What a gift she & God gave me!!! =)=)=)
She was 7lbs. 6oz. & 20 1/2 in. long! Healthy & slightly chubby, just the way we like 'em. =) Long, dark hair (surprised me!) with a perfect complexion & beautiful features (did not surprise me! =), the softest skin imaginable, and all those cute li'l fingers & toes!!! =)
She hardly cried a bit... The entire 2 1/2 days she was in the hospital no single person heard her cry more than a couple times! She's simply unflappable! =) Marvelously dispositioned all the way around... A gift to the entire world, this one will be... Calming down, cheering up, & influencing for good everyone she meets. =) Yay, Princess Beauty!!!
*For those of you who haven't been privy to the courses of action that I've needed to take on these past months, since Christmas, well... I'm sorry that I haven't had the opportunity to talk with you, but I'm about to share a portion of it all & I want you to close your eyes, take a deep breath, & prepare yourself... K?
It may be a rough ride...
So, in my sharing of the details of her precious, precious, precious spirit & form, you can semi-sorta-kinda-maybe a little tiny bit-possibly-but probably not-but it'd be nice if you tried anyway-imagine how excrutiatingly difficult (understatement of the century) it was to sign her over to another couple of parents.
Yep. You read correctly.
She is no longer mine... Not my child to raise!!!
She will be raised within another family's circle, under another mother's watchful eye, within the arms of a safe daddy...
At times, I cannot even believe that this is my reality... But it is. And, yes, there is inherent pain. (Which is truly indescribable, so I'm not even going to waste my time trying...) But there is also peace, comfort, & joy beyond measure...
Heavenly Father has, in every sincerity, laid out such clear guidance & direction, throughout this entire experience, that there is no doubt whatsoever over this decision... He helped me through the beginning of the process (when I was like, "Are you freakin' kidding me? You want me to WHAT?!?!?! NEVVVER!!!!!) all the way beyond the signing of the papers (meaning He's still helping me through the healing process, when I feel at times, "Are you freakin' kidding me? I'm supposed to just GO ON?!?" And He gently says,"Yes, hon, and it's going to be better than okay... You know she's in the right place... Breathe, trust..." & so somehow, well, I do as He says... And there's peace beyond comprehension). I could NEVER have done this without Him, in all His miraculously mind-boggling mercy, piloting my way!
I AM SOOO GRATEFUL!!! His grace is truly sufficient in any & all circumstances!!! I never even came close to imagining that I could come to this point in this whole process... I fought & struggled against it, with all my momma lioness qualities, but I have learned throughout my life to trust in Him above & beyond it all, so...
I have.
I long to share more, but it's already taken me so long to get this much to you & I feel I must post this tonight. (I know I foolishly said I'd post immediately upon return from the hospital, but I've been on an essential & amazing healing experience... One which, I'm sure you would agree, took priority over updating the blog. =)
I love you all sooo much & I pray this news reaches you with at least a small portion of the peace, comfort, & joy that I've felt, & tried to express... Enough so that my sharing this by no means causes any anguish. (Trust me, I've already been through that... Enough for all of us! No need for you to feel it! =)
She is absolutely, without a doubt, in the most loving, safe place I've ever known! Designed for her by her loving, keenly aware, Father in Heaven. I love her family more than words could ever express! God has given her parents that are truly worthy of her as a gift to them... And it is a truly, marvelously indescribable event that has taken place, in all our hearts, to be a part in this particular adoption process. (So, yet again, I will not attempt to describe it... You'll just have to take my word for it. =)=)=)
I pray all are "feelin' the love" =), coming closer to understanding how utterly & unendingly God loves us all, & using the Atonement to work through even the most excrutiating events,
Truly At Peace,
Loving You Always,
Angelina
